doctor_j_crane | [60]

Entry tags:

[60] - [Voice]

For reasons totally unrelated to the recent flood, I've recently turned my mind to the issue of barge romantic relationships. [Crane sounds awkward just saying it.] Frankly, I'm confused as to why anyone could ever think that it ever would work out. Ignoring numerous public examples of messy arguments between wardens and inmates alike, I've never in my experience heard of a prison being described as a good dating environment. While the inmates do obviously suffer a certain lack of options, it's the wardens that persist in romantic liaisons that surprise me.

How can your supposed relationships have real meaning if they have an expiration date date? Or would you be willing to give up your family, friends and universe for one person who seemed like a good option while you were in a prison? You can believe me when I say that it isn't only unrealistic, it's unhealthy. It's no more valuable than a relationship forged in a war zone, done by the same messy necessity and a certain need to settle for what is available, no matter how substandard. It's disturbing how easily you all seem to give in to the delusion that it means something. It doesn't. It just has that sliver more meaning than the rest of your pointless existence on the barge. Furthermore, it's a disservice to your inmates and not to mention a failure in your duties as wardens. You're not here to find meaningful relationships with each other. You're supposed to be helping us.

[Pause. Crane sounds slightly more amused.] I hadn't done this in a while. It's highly therapeutic for me to tell you all the ways that you're wrong. I recommend it highly to other inmates.

[Private- Edward Nygma]

It could be slightly related to the flood. [The longest pause.] I'm not sure that I want to talk about it. I do apologize though.

[OOC: Whoops, going to do that post and run thing. Will be back in eight hours, after sleep. <3]

Threaded | Flat

I think you have to approach it with a lack of illusions in the matter. Perhaps it is just a matter of having someone you can rely on, and someone you can count on, no matter what. I have said quite a bit of this before, I imagine, but I think sometimes... I'd never have any relationship here that I wouldn't at home.

But you're also right that the parameters are different. You can't really con yourself that this is home, or a normal world, or a particularly nice one where relationships work, and work in a usual, functional manner. I don't think it means it's substandard, I think you're just working with what you can and making the best of it.

I have no doubt in saying that anyone I did have a relationship here with is... someone I'd have done the same with in the real world. But, I'd never expect them to choose me, and here, over the real world. That's treating this place like a home - and it isn't. It's too transient, too unstable, and too dangerous to do that. That doesn't quite stand in the way of serious, real emotions, though.

So I don't think I agree with you, but you're not entirely wrong, either.

There are numerous at least's on the tip of my tongue. I'll share them for your peace of mind:

At least there was no forced reciprocation.

At least we didn't fornicate.

At least I wasn't a woman/cat/alien.

At least there was no toxin involved.

At least we can move on.

Feeling better? Good, because this is the one and only time it will come up in conversation.

[He waits a beat.]

I do agree with your emotional outburst, however. Relationships are perilous at the best of times. At the worst-- and we're currently residing in the worst-- they're teetering on the edge of irresponsible. I wouldn't advise it unless you're prepared to dismiss that individual as a fling if they disappear.

Or, you could make plans to not have to pick one world over another, because asking someone to do that is not fair, which not that it's any of your business, but we have.

If my inmate has a problem with it, then she can address me with it. As for everything else, Crane, just troll harder.

When you put it that way... [She draws in a shaky breath and laughs dryly.] It does seem stupid, huh?

But people do forge relationships in war: nurses, and women in the towns where soldiers are stationed and such. And sometimes one or the other is killed, certainly, but a person could die at any time, from anything.

And this is all just assuming that someone is only settling for the best of what's here, but what if they aren't? What if by not acting they'd then be settling for anybody else they meet after, while a part of their heart still resides here?

And I don't see how any of it could be a disservice to anybody somebody was wardening at all, really. It's quite possible to care quite a lot about more than one person at a time.

Oh god, that is so much more personal than I ever wanted to think about involving you to see first time I check the network in days.

What makes you so sure people are settling for something substandard?

~~Crane, Sport, if someone like someone enough they're gonna want to hump 'em. That goes with the Barge or anywhere else.~~

[And then he decides not to feed the troll and doesn't send it.]

All couplings, whether in a healthy or unhealthy environment, have an expiration date, and all locations contain limited choices.

Come on, you can do better than this.

That's quite an absolutist position. [FOR A MAN WHO SCANT DAYS AGO WAS HITTING ON MY EX >C]

Not everyone has family and friends they want to go back to. Of course, if I did meet someone here, my fans would miss me, but some people here don't have fans to worry about.

Not all of us have delusions of being together after the barge, Crane.

Not everyone needs that.

Have your eye on someone?

Can you ever make a post about everything the Barge is doing wrong without insulting me?

Out of curiosity - do you make posts because you're trying to get people to want to hit you, or is that an unintended side effect?

Threaded | Flat

private

Private;

no subject

[ Private | Video ]

no subject

no subject

no subject