[8] - Post-Port (Video)

[doctor_j_crane]

[It's pretty clear by the large amount of people in the background that Crane's currently sitting in the infirmary.]

Apparently, zombies exist and are fairly hungry. [Crane sounds absolutely terrible. As in worst sore throat ever. Important things got eaten by the zombies, bb.] Also, we seem to actually be on a magical barge.

[Pause]

Cue the candid camera moment. Your experiment is successful. I actually have gone so far over the other edge of things that I think this place might actually exist.

[Five seconds of slow clapping. Clap, clap, clap.]

My main question is why would the Admiral do this to us? What does he gain? Why is this happening? Why are we here? What are you wardens getting from this? Why not just leave us to rot after being dead?

[After putting that large amount of effort into that little rant, Crane bursts into a fit of some pretty serious coughing. After he finishes, he turns back to the camera, even raspier then before.]

Why do all of you people put up with this?


[Private - Max]

Thanks. For keeping me company in the infirmary. [Not sarcastic, genuine.]

Comments

[puzzleprince.livejournal.com]

Now Jon, don't be so hard on yourself. Your inquiries are perfectly reasonable.

You're welcome to take it up as a casual project. The Admiral might provide you with the necessary materials, if you ask nicely, and your efforts would be greatly appreciated by your fellow inmates, I'm sure.

[doctor-j-crane.livejournal.com]

I wasn't referring to myself, as you well know. The most recent inmates on a whole are rather slow on the uptake. They wander around, doing nothing, and moaning about how unpleasant the barge it. As if they know considering they must have only been here a week.

Why don't you do it? You could fill it with stupid jokes and special advice, such as 'jump of the barge while you're having a psychotic break, it'll be fun'.

[puzzleprince.livejournal.com]

Isn't that a tad hypocritical? It took you a considerable amount of time to acknowledge the barge's existence, and now that you have, you're asking the very same redundant questions.

The flood influenced my actions. There you go, short and sweet.

[puzzleprince.livejournal.com]

And I don't make stupid jokes.

Oh, man. I love Eddie so much. : D

[doctor-j-crane.livejournal.com]

No, it's completely different. I'm asking those questions with the weight of experience. The new inmates are just stabbing in the dark.

Also, You could have just said that before, instead of now. Why the delay?

He's lovable in the worst of ways. <':

[puzzleprince.livejournal.com]

Your experience doesn't make them any less redundant. Perhaps its worse to be stabbing in the light.

[Another delay. Oh, the irony.]

For effect. It made you pause and think, didn't it?

[doctor-j-crane.livejournal.com]

I suppose it did. [Said in the most begrudging way possible.] It doesn't make what you did any better though. If anything, it just means you're not apologetic about it at all.

[puzzleprince.livejournal.com]

Had you jumped, I certainly would have verbalized my regret.

[doctor-j-crane.livejournal.com]

Well, that makes it all fine then. You would have said that you felt bad. That certainly compensates.

[puzzleprince.livejournal.com]

Why yes, it does! I'm glad thats settled.

[doctor-j-crane.livejournal.com]

You know I was being sarcastic.

[puzzleprince.livejournal.com]

Very perceptive of you.

[doctor-j-crane.livejournal.com]

You know, you're not half as amusing as you think you are.

[puzzleprince.livejournal.com]

You make it sound like a consciously try to be amusing.

[doctor-j-crane.livejournal.com]

You are. I know your type.

[puzzleprince.livejournal.com]

What 'type' might this be?

In the baseball post, Crane nominated Eddie for umpire in the name of trolling. :D

[doctor-j-crane.livejournal.com]

Well, I would tell you, but people around here don't seem to appriciate my analysis. So perhaps I'll keep it to myself.

That is the most frustrating job anyone could ever give Eddie. Oh Crane. <3

[puzzleprince.livejournal.com]

I have my doubts about its accuracy, but go on. I'm not going to jump to the extremes of reaction if its something I find displeasing.

Passive aggressiveness makes life fun. :D

[doctor-j-crane.livejournal.com]

Does the phrase sociopathic narcissist mean anything to you?

[puzzleprince.livejournal.com]

Your name comes to mind, yes.

Lol, Eddie hit the nail right on the head. :D

[doctor-j-crane.livejournal.com]

Again, your attempts to be amusing are unnecessary and fall quite flat.

Just going to continue hitting that nail XD

[puzzleprince.livejournal.com]

I could say the same about your attempt at evasion.

/Hammer noises

[doctor-j-crane.livejournal.com]

I'm not attempting to evade. If anyone is, it's you. You keep attempting to transfer your issues onto me.

/More hammer noises

[puzzleprince.livejournal.com]

We call that projecting, which is what you're currently doing. And not very subtly, I might add.

But since you're not evading, lets talk about this sociopathic narcissism of yours.

/Hammery hammery

[doctor-j-crane.livejournal.com]

I don't need projection explained to me. It's just another example of you being patronizing.

And we have nothing to talk about.