doctor_j_crane

Inmates, I have a question for you. If you could have a deal like the wardens have to go along with graduation, would that make you more inclined to make an effort?

[Private - Kay, Eddie Nygma and Capa. Plus Iago.]

Considering that I've been informed that I should come to any of you if I have any issues, I thought that I should take advantage of the opportunity. I want to work in the infirmary. Hypothetically only one of you needs to agree, correct?

[This was up for a few minutes, before it's removed. Feel free to have your bro see it.] Never mind, the situation is resolved.

[Additional Private to Eddie.]

Also, I don't suppose you want to help me move something?

A vet. Seriously, Admiral? I'm a qualified doctor, not to mention the years I spent specializing. [Crane's tone is very much "I can't even".]

Even so, that was one of the least offensive ports I've taken part in. How many people died, exactly? Surely it doesn't compare to that time we were in that town with the carnival.

[Added later]

I'm aware that a number of you are from an alternate universe that also possess the Batman. I want to ask you something about your Gotham.


[Private - Capa]

I'm not entirely sure what to say. Apparently even in the time period we were in, you were still wasting your time on useless things. [Not said particularly vindictively.]

[Private - Eames]

I gave the Batman the formulas for the toxin that Nygma used on Arthas. [Pause.] There was no way of knowing that he was going to do that.

[Private - Eddie]

[Feel the awkward pause.] I gather that isn't quite what you expected from the port. You aren't demoted yet, are you?

You know, after all the months fawning after Adam I'd imagined that some of you would tire of his presence. But all I hear in the dining hall is about Adam. "Adam saved me during a flood." This person had a tryst with Adam. Adam is such a wonderful person.

Well, let me tell you a story about Adam, barge. It was during a particularly nasty port where myself and a former barge member called Irene Adler were stuck in a ward, attempting to avoid being gruesomely murdered by no less than one dozen undead patients. Despite Adler's skills and my efforts, we were unable to hold off the hoards of undead. You can understand our surprise when Adam burst into the room and started assisting us. We managed to kill the zombies, following a rather ingenious plan of Adam's involving a puddle of water and some faulty wiring on one of the medical machines.

Do you see the problem with this story, barge? Adam could have killed both Adler and I. But he was so wrapped up in his heroics that he failed to consider that some of us might not want to get electrocuted. He simply didn't care. Instead, he forced his plan on us and hoped for the best. [Crane does not sound impressed.] Classical Adam. No sense of boundaries, no urge to ask permission or for the input of others. And yet, he seems to be one of the most well known people on board. I fail to understand his appeal.

[Rant over. Crane pauses for a few moments.] Hayley. Claire. Nygma. I want to talk to you three. Despite my continuing lack of filters.

[OOC: Sorry, Adam. Crane is so emotionally functional in how he shows his respect. Also, his flood affected-ness is to be more empathetic, so he might feel bad if you bring up past issues. Although you might not be able to tell.]